I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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