what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
