Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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