sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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