PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
