she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
