Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
