It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
