oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
