Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Randomize
