Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Terrible idea I love it
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
