How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
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