Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
