eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Oh god it's open bar.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
