Did you just see the Batmobile???
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
