thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Randomize
