u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
