Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Randomize