my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
