I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
