sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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