so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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