I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
