no. you can't hotbox the world.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
