I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
they need to just BURY HIM!
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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