Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
