people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
this will be a night to untag.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Randomize
