woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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