i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
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