id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
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