: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
