You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
