i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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