so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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