Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
