Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
