just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
