i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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