Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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