You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
