Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Randomize
