remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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