She's JV to your varsity
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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