capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I FOUND THE LEGS
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
