i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Randomize
