What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize