that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
