actually, I'm a sock model
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
