It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
