so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
